I was fearful that this was what had happened and I have been justified in my fears.
I have ruptured the anterior cruciate ligament in my left knee.
The initial denial stopped me from seeing a doctor as soon as I should. I tried to persevere and I even managed to go back to training a few times.
Alas, it was for nothing. Collapsing in a heap in agony should have notified me of this earlier.
Instead, I now find myself facing a full knee reconstruction.
So I have a painful surgery and a huge amount of rehabilitation in front of me.
Talking to my doctor (who it turns out is one of the top knee orthos in Australia), I have been advised to use the patella tendon graft as opposed to the hamstring graft. It's going to hurt more, but it seems like it's going to give me the strongest knee ligament and the smaller chance of the graft not taking.
The extra pain isn't welcome, but short term pain for longer term gain seems like the best option to take.
I want my active life back. I want to ski again and I want the thrill of taking a mark back.
It's just another challenge to overcome.